The being social thing, the book thing, and the state of the thing.

Hello people.

It’s been awhile between posts. It was a long week and I’m tired. Not  a subtle lazy tired, but full on nodding off at 1pm, in bed after nine sort of tired.

I feel that way now, and its only 7pm.

I have to stay up though.

The teen boy is off being social.

Now, I am rather solitary.  I like people in general but I find that spending too long a time around people other than my children can become very draining regardless of how much I like them.

Most of my getting out has to do with the children, or something I’m involved in, like volunteering for the different counts (herps and insects), something related to a hobby (like Sherlock or photography), attending lectures, classes or meetings (art, or the entomological society).  I’m not a party-er, have  never set foot in a club,  and do not go to large get togethers for the most part.

My idea of a good time is settling in with a book.  I’m reading Alan Turing’s biography at the moment.

HOWEVER I am absolutely thrilled my son has gotten into going to the secular teen mixers the home school group (in collab with several others) have set up.

The boy, despite my and his father’s best efforts, is more solitary than I.

He is a kind, polite, considerate young man, who wants to be alone most of the time.  His intelligence, combined with the social challenges of aspergers, make it doubly hard for him to connect with his peers (or most anyone else for that matter).  Like myself, he has never seemed to care. (alone doesn’t always mean lonely)

Yet, something about these “mixers” is attractive to the kid.  If this were back in his old public school days, I’d be biting my nails to the quick worried about how the thing was going. I don’t have the slightest worry about the kids here.

Not one thing makes me anxious about them.

Speaking of good things.

I took the boy to THE THING today

The book thing.

“The Book Thing of Baltimore, Inc., like all great ideas, began in a bar.  It was started by some teachers looking to drown their troubles and a bibliophile bartender.  The teachers needed books for their classrooms and the bartender couldn’t pass up cheap classics. The word spread and folks started bringing books they no longer wanted to the bar and other people came looking.”


Twenty four hours a day, seven days a week you can drop off books.

(now in a warehouse)

Saturday and Sunday you can pick up, for free, AS MANY BOOKS AS YOU WANT.

Its an oven in the summer, freezing in the winter,

and usually crowded.


Here is a blurry cell phone pic of today:


This is just the entrance, it goes on and on.

It was stuffy and crowded, so we only stayed about a half hour.

We got a GREAT HAUL.

I found biographies, American History Readers, some fun fiction for little bee, science books, joke books, mysteries and a couple of picture books.


Here are Aidan’s finds:


It leaves me with stuffed bookcases and the need of a future bookcase in all likelihood.

Which brings me to the last thing,

The state of the thing

I am in the processes of adding our library to I will,I’m sure get around to finishing one of these days but in meantime if you are interested in what else is on our shelves – have a look see.

My library thing.



9 thoughts on “The being social thing, the book thing, and the state of the thing.

  1. shebenlee says:

    My son is a 14 yr old Aspie. Whom is being home schooled. I am constantly being reminded how important socialising is. But I can’t help but wonder, just because most of us need company does that make it right for all. I have this contestant guilt nagging at me. He has no friends, participates in no sports or extra activities. He is socialised though. He can hold a conversation for example if we’re out at a family gathering. But he seems quiet content with no friends. He is really happy with his life. He loves the computer. So he has his online family. And I do nothing to encourage outside the home social activities. For this I feel guilty. I myself am not a big fan of people and I have had a lot of bad experiences with most people who were meant to be close to me. A part of me believes he’s better off without people anyway. They hurt you, use you, and I find no one really cares for you. So am I way out of line, or is it possible that for a few,friendship and company is over rated.

    • amandasmills says:

      People have their own needs for friendship and company, so if he is happy, I wouldn’t feel guilty, If I were you.
      My teen is much like yours, alone yet happy. Yet over the years he has been given the opportunities for things outside of home. Even if he doesn’t make friends, he’ll get used to being around people other than his family, and possibly make connections for other opportunities in the future. He’s allowed to say no, or try things and change his mind. That is part of respecting him (including his neurology).

      • shebenlee says:

        Thanks. My guilt is a little lighter. I figure he’ll be joining the work force next year. Which is a huge social activity. Also I feel as he gets older and goes to uni and a career. He’ll meet people and if he chooses he can form friendships then.

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